Speaker 1: 0:26

And in case you ever wondered fat chance. But just in case you ever wondered fat chance, but just in case you ever wondered, what do I do when I'm waiting on guests? Hold on here just a minute. What do I do when I'm waiting on a guest for a podcast? That's usually what I do Hold on just a sec.

Speaker 1: 1:09

As it turns out, today I don't have a guest and I'm going to try to keep this pretty short and it's going to be an extension of something that I posted about, I think maybe two or three, posted about, I think maybe two or three evenings ago as a strategy less a strategy as an exercise for conditioning your mental resilience, and it's an exercise that you can do anytime, but that you really want to capitalize on when things aren't going so good in your life or when you don't really feel very well. And, in fact, the worse you feel there we go, the worse you feel, the more effective this exercise will be in the long run for you. So what am I talking about? You know, a lot of people these days are really trying, really grasping, trying to find ways to become more resilient, to become more focused and have more grit and determination to get through not only what's happening but what they anticipate or fear happening. And one of the things that we have a tendency to do we like to work on things, whatever it may be, whether maybe getting better at our tennis game, golf game, you name it we like to work on refining the mental and psychological aspect of those games or, in some cases, not games at all very real parts of life. When we feel good Think about it who doesn't like to do things? When you feel good, as a rule, when we feel not so good or even just shitty, that's when we back off and that's when we just kind of go into shutdown mode. And from a biological and physiological standpoint that makes sense because when we, especially when we are ill or fighting an infection or something, our body gears down to enable us to survive, because that's when our resources are really being drained and need all the extra sleep and rest and fluids that we can get. So if we push it physically, when we feel like that, we're just asking for trouble. We're just asking for trouble.

Speaker 1: 4:09

And I think where this happens more than probably any place else is when it comes to sleep. You know especially the real type A people are like look, I like to get things done. There's still. You know, if I go to bed now, yeah, but I've got two more hours to work if I stay up, so I'll stay up. You always pay for that and the debt is agonizingly painful. It gets you eventually Never. Never negotiate on your sleep, and I know, I know there's always somebody who says I have no choice. I've yet to find very many examples of where somebody truly legitimately had no choice Difficult, sure, hard to manage, sure, have a bunch of kids, absolutely, but can't do it, impossible. That's almost never the case. Guard your sleep like it's gold, because in truth it's worth more than gold.

Speaker 1: 5:24

But let's come back to this idea of liking to do things when we feel good. When it comes to mental resilience and psychological, emotional resilience, I want you to think about something the times that you are training yourself for the experiences that you are attempting to condition your resilience and your grit and your tenacity to be able to be there for you when they happen those things, when they happen, you aren't going to be feeling very good, I can almost promise you. I can almost promise you and in fact, just because that's kind of the way that life seems to want to work a lot of the times when you really are going to have to call on your grit and your tenacity and your psychological resolve. Those things are going to happen when you have the flu. They're going to happen when you just stumbled in the backyard when you were mowing or doing some yard work and broke your ankle. They're going to happen when you've worked an exhausting work week. You've had the grandkids one of them was sick, you were up half the night three nights in a row and you are ragged, been conditioning yourself to be able to be more resilient, psychologically stable and rock solid. For is can't, I'm wiped out, I can't do this, I'm sick, I just broke my ankle. I haven't slept for three nights. I can't, I just can't, I can't, I just can't.

Speaker 1: 7:52

And the point that a lot of people miss when they are trying to gear up and really shore up their inner resources and their psychological strength is that if we only do those exercises, if we only strategize, if we only put ourselves in those situations and kind of role play and do some future projection, if we only do that when we feel good, then what happens is we've set up an association in our brain that says is we've set up an association in our brain that says I'm okay and have all kinds of energy and tenacity and grit to fight and have resilience as long as I feel good. And we've conditioned our brain to think that way because the only time we did those exercises, the only times that we role-played, the only times that we projected future situations and inserted ourselves into them and saw ourselves behaving and responding and engaging resourcefully, is when we felt good. And again that happens because we only like to do exercises like that or strategize or role-play or think about future situations when we feel good. Do you see the problem there? If you want to get rock solid on being able to have that knuckle-down, ass-kicking grit, don't fuck with me. You cannot stop me. I will fight to the bloody end. And if you want that, when the shit hits the fan and when you are tired and ragged, you better be doing some of these exercises and future projections when you are tired and when you are ragged, when you haven't had enough sleep and when everything about you is screaming. Not now. Not now, god damn it. I'm tired. I've been up three fucking nights. I'll do this tomorrow when I feel better. I've got a clearer head, and so on and on it goes.

Speaker 1: 10:33

And so what happens then is you wind up with individuals who have put in the time, they've thought about this in a very cerebral way and in what they think to be a very logical way and laid out a progression of how they can get better at being psychologically, mentally and emotionally a more resilient person, and they put in the time, they do the things. Mentally and emotionally a more resilient person, and they put in the time, they do the things, but they do them only when they feel good. And then one day they're home from work sick. Excuse me, they're home from work sick. They're on the couch. They've got 101, maybe 102 fever. They feel like ass. They're nauseous. Maybe they've already been up twice and puked. They don't feel good, they feel rotten. They don't feel good, they feel rotten. Nobody's there to get them something to drink or help clean up the puke or do any of those really nasty things that come with being sick, with something like influenza. They're just there feeling like ass, all by themselves and not wanting to move off that couch.

Speaker 1: 12:07

In fact, if you've really got legitimate influenza, you probably knocked down so hard that it takes everything you've got to get up off of that couch, go to the restroom or whatever it is that you need to do to get through your day. And those are the times when things still happen, are the times when you still get the call of hey, your child just fell down and hit his or her head really hard. We've called the ambulance. They are on their way to the ER. Now, if you've got legitimate influenza, they don't want you in the er hacking all around.

Speaker 1: 13:08

But my point is there are going to be times when you are going to be called upon to have to do things that will require resilience, tenacity, grit and that kick-ass attitude that is able to flip a switch and say, you know what, okay, fuck it. Yes, I've been feeling like ass this morning. I flip a switch because for right now, for this moment, for this task, I have to push that aside. I have to act, I have to engage anyway. My child needs me and if I can walk, if I can breathe, if I can talk, I need to engage because there's no one else here right now to do so.

Speaker 1: 13:59

And what I'm telling you is if the only time you've ever conditioned your mind to be able to persevere and act in the face of stiff challenges and not feeling well and having all kinds of obstacles thrown in your way, either real or imagined. If the only time you've prepared for that is when you feel good, you will fail. You will fail to meet the moment. And the reason you will fail again is because you've never prepared while you felt like ass. You've never prepared when you could barely keep your eyes open because you are so tired. You've never prepared when you are so stressed out and pissed off because you just got home after your boss told you you're going to get canned a month from now and you better be looking for a new job. You've only prepared when you felt good. And if the only time you've ever prepared is when you felt good, the first time life comes along and knocks you dead on your ass while you feel bad, it's goodnight, nurse, it's show over, it's.

Speaker 1: 15:30

I throw in the towel, I'm sick, I'm tired, I can't. I quit Now. You might think that what I'm telling you is not true. Although I've been doing this for a while, I would imagine there is a greater chance than not that you're listening to me going fuck man, that's exactly right. I know myself and I know by default most people are looking for a reason to quit. Most people are looking for an excuse to be able to throw in the towel and bow out and be able to say, well, you know, I would have, but I was sick, I would have, but I was tired, I would have, but I'd been up all night with the kids and not have anybody look at me like I did something horrible. Yeah, jack is right about that. If you do happen to be somebody who's sitting there going that's bullshit. When the shit hit the fan, if it really called on me to get up, goddammit, I would do it.

Speaker 1: 17:02

If you are quoting that from past experience, meaning if you have had many of those experiences like I described, where you were knocked down, where you were tired, where you were sick, where you had a plethora of excuses, so to speak, and the moment called for you to act and you did it, even though you felt that way, then okay, if you don't have those reference experiences and you are just kind of willy-nilly saying oh nope, if it happens, I'll rise to the moment, saying oh nope, if it happens, I'll rise to the moment, I'm telling you that is likely not how it will happen, it's just not. We don't rise to the level of our expectations, we fall to the level of our highest and most effective training or conditioning or planning. And this is one area where, if you haven't planned, if you haven't trained, if you haven't conditioned yourself adequately mentally, emotionally, psychologically you will almost certainly fail. I wish I had better news for you in that regard, so we could just be the lazy human beings that we have a tendency to be and then have things work out the way we need them to when we need them to. But again, I've been doing this a while and I'm a realist about human behavior. I understand human behavior and, as such, I'm telling you, if you want to be that person, that a resilient and a gritty, hell-bent-for-election manner with no quit in you, you have to condition yourself to do so. You have to train yourself, you have to prepare yourself mentally, emotionally, physically even, to be able to do that. And the most effective way to do that is to use every moment in your life rather, I got ahead of myself there To use every moment in your life where you feel bad, where you are pissed off, where you are sick, where you are tired, where shit just is not going your way and you are not at your best and you feel like your ass has been kicked up the road and back and you don't want to do anything. You don't feel like doing anything, you believe you can't do anything. Right, then, those are the moments you need to be imagining yourself feeling exactly like that in the future, when something wallops you right between the eyes, when something wallops you right between the eyes, and persevering, pushing forward, doing what you need to be done, even feeling and thinking like that.

Speaker 1: 20:46

If you condition, if you train, if you educate your brain to think, even when I feel like this, I can still, if I have to, I can reach down, flip that, get up and kick ass switch and I can perform, I can engage, I can do anyway. And if, while you are feeling like ass, those are the things you are telling yourself and those are the scenarios that you are imagining, placing yourself in and responding resourcefully, responding with grit, tenacity, determination and resolve, and doing so while you feel like a bucket of assholes, then when the time comes, your mind will have already been trained, it will already have been educated and programmed, if you will, to understand that. Yes, because I've felt like ass and thought about these situations so many times before. While I felt like ass, then the fact that I feel like ass right now, in this moment, does not prohibit me from being able to rise to the occasion. It does not. But that only happens if you educate your brain, and you do so because you've made the decision.

Speaker 1: 22:35

This is how I want my mind, my body, my emotions and my psychological makeup. This is how I want it to work. This is how I want to be able to perform. This is where and when I want to be able to perform, and I want to be able to do it even if I feel at the shittiest I ever feel. And when you are there, you are a resilient, a gritty and a resourceful human being who can and will respond and never quit. And never quit, always push forward, always see another day, always see another day.

Speaker 1: 23:28

And when you hear somebody say it's too late, your brain will scream what the fuck are you? Too late, too late. I'm still breathing, I'm still alive, I can still get up, I have both arms, I have both legs, I have a brain. Too late, too late? For what? Should we just throw in the towel right now, while we are still strong and vibrant and capable Too late.

Speaker 1: 24:06

You need to educate your brain, because that's just not computing with me. I don't understand that kind of thinking Too late. It's never too late if I'm still breathing, it is not. This is Jack Hopkins. And now, now that you know what I do while I am waiting on guests and that is fiddle around playing a little guitar and you've been able to listen to the far, far, far, far more important aspect of this podcast episode, which is how to condition yourself appropriately and adequately to respond resourcefully and with grit and determination when the shit hits the fan and when you feel like hell or are tired or have no energy, because chances are great that when the shit does hit the fan, that is exactly how you will feel, and if you're not ready to perform when you feel like that, you won't. This is Jack Hopkins, and I will talk to you again soon.